Tag: high low thankful

HIGH // LOW // THANKFUL

Posted on by Lynzie · Leave a comment

IMG_1091

Having a preemie is a special kind of blessing. That Roux came to me as early as he did meant that, right from the beginning, we were starting from a different place. The first several days of his life were filled with so many questions and so much pain, and every week since has been a little less uncertain and a little more relaxed. Of all the things I have done, surviving those first two months of my tiny guy’s life was by far the most challenging. A baby born before it has fully developed is not the same as a baby born at term, and I will never forget how small and fragile he was the first time I held him, 36 hours after his birth.

Ten weeks later, and suddenly my preemie has grown into a baby. A squishy little person, all bright eyed and gurgly. He’s chubbed up quite nicely, and to us he seems so much bigger than he was – because he is so much bigger than he was! He has more than doubled his birthweight, weighing just about nine pounds, and fits nicely into his newborn clothes. What’s most exciting, though, is that on his seventieth day on Earth, he woke up.

HIGH: On Monday, Roux smiled at me, really smiled at me, for the first time in his life. It made me weep, from such a precious place that only a brand new mother holding her newborn infant can access, and I will always remember this as the moment my Roux Huckleberry met me. He has given me the same wide mouthed grin every day since, each time another tug on my heartstrings. I am so glad he’s here.

LOW: Extended Family Drama. Honestly, it is instances like these that make me overwhelmingly grateful for my sweet nuclear family and our lovely life, remarkably free from familial obligation and other such cumbersome attachments.

THANKFUL: Not to brag or anything, but my baby is sleeping through the night more often than not. He goes to bed between 8:30 and 9 each evening, and wakes up once between 2-4 AM, or not at all. The pediatrician was so impressed with his mature sleeping patterns as well as his substantial weight gain, and gave us a very positive prognosis. We were given quite a scare during those first few weeks, and being clear of most of what was presented to us is nothing short of a miracle. All babies are miracles, life is a miracle, but this tiny guy is my miracle. I’m just so, so grateful and I’m not sure that I ever won’t be grateful for how well he overcame his birth.

I, on the other hand, have a lot of healing to do. But knowing that my tiny guy is developing well is an invitation to turn my energy toward my own recovery.

HIGH // LOW // THANKFUL

Posted on by Lynzie · Leave a comment

brotherybrother

taken a few years ago at Barney’s Beanery, a few days before he left the country for a year

I have seven siblings. SEVEN. When I was younger, shuffling between my divorced parents’ respective houses, I wasn’t able to appreciate the fact that I was surrounded by a tribe of really cool kids. I should probably mention that my parents have been married a collective five times, and that I share only one parent with each of my brothers and sisters, but my point is that, as I got older, I began to realize how lucky I am to be related to such special people.

That one up there is Tyler, my Brothery Brother. He’s my mother’s third child, the second child of her third marriage, my second brother, and the first one to be up for any kind of crazy adventure. His wanderlust has taken him everywhere from Colorado to Australia, so it came as no surprise when I learned he up and moved to San Jose without even saying goodbye! Definitely the saddest part of my week. I might have even cried a little. So this is me, wishing him well on his new endeavor in Northern California. I love you, Tyler. I’m proud of you. But I want you back in Southern California as soon as possible, ok?

HIGH: By far, the best thing to happen this week is that our insurance has finally been sorted. It was a bit of a harrowing experience, trying to navigate all of these new policies and procedures, but after nearly nine straight weeks of paperwork and phone calls, it’s all been settled and an enormous weight has been lifted. It’s worth mentioning that I encountered some very, very nice customer service representatives, and they deserve credit for being so incredibly helpful. It really was a confusing process, and I am extremely grateful for how it all managed to work out.

LOW: My house isn’t any more organized today than it was on Monday, and I haven’t written anything since last Friday, which is to say that I didn’t get nearly as much done this week as I had intended. No laundry, no scrubbing, no sweeping, nothing. It’s hard when the only tangible evidence to the endless work I seem to do each day is the pile of dirty diapers in the rubbish bin, and I’m trying my best to embrace my temporary role as stay-at-home-mama, but I sure would like a few uninterrupted hours to tackle my ever growing to-do list. That being said, if the lowest point of my week is the fact that my house isn’t clean, then I think I’m doing pretty good. How’s that for perspective!

THANKFUL: Our tiny guy is waking up more and more each day, and he’s beginning to connect with each of us which has been very exciting for Emet and Jade. This morning, I left the two big kids alone with the baby for about fifteen minutes, and overheard the sweetest interactions between the three of them. Siblings really are the best, and I’m so happy to get to witness their special relationships develop. I hope when they’re older, they stay as close as I have with my own siblings. And that they never wake up to discover one has moved without saying goodbye. I’m just saying.

HIGH // LOW // THANKFUL

Posted on by Lynzie · 1 Comment

maxwangerfeet

image via

I should probably just give up the idea of a successful weekly series entirely because, let’s be honest, consistency is not exactly a strength of mine. It’s not even consistently a weakness of mine, that’s how bad I am at being consistent. It should have been no surprise that I missed the second installment of HLT, is what I’m saying. The first is here, in case you missed it.

HIGH: I wore my engagement ring on my middle finger for over six weeks because I couldn’t bear to part with it long enough for it to be sized. I finally shipped it back to its maker earlier this month, and practically hugged the UPS guy when he brought it safely back to me this week. I can’t stop looking at my left hand, that’s how pretty it is.

LOW: We made secret plans for a quick getaway to the desert, involving live music and a fancy hotel, which we were forced to abandon at the last minute. Sadface.

THANKFUL: To the good people of El Indio I say muchos gracias for having fed my family no fewer than five times this past week. I’ve never met a potato taco I didn’t like, but theirs is my favorite. Also, tamales. And buñuelos!

We’ve got company visiting from out-of-state this weekend, which means there is lots of good food and a trip to the beach in my near future, but which also means I’d better do something about my bedroom. Someone please tell me I’m not the only one incapable of keeping a nightstand organized, oy vey iz mir.

HIGH // LOW // THANKFUL

Posted on by Lynzie · 1 Comment

ourbabyroux

photo by jamie street

I’m not exactly sure where the rest of March went, but I’m pretty certain most of it was spent nursing? It definitely wasn’t spent sleeping. Or cleaning, ahem. But it most definitely was spent cuddling a certain scrumptious baby who, by the way, is a whole fifty percent bigger than he was at birth. Meaning, he’s a solid six and a half pounds, which doesn’t sound like much, but I assure you. He is b-i-g.

So, April! A new month – and a new season – calls for a new series. We’ve had a tradition in our home for the last several years, one that began as a way to engage the kids in meaningful discussions around the dinner table, in which we each declare our highest, lowest, and most thankful moment for that day. I thought it might be fun, on a weekly basis, to bring that same idea to this space….

HIGH: Without a doubt, the highlight of this week was when my tiny guy told me his very first story. To be fair, he didn’t tell me, he told my friend Kelli. But I was there! And it was precious.

LOW: I received a certain, and most unexpected, electronic correspondence on Tuesday. I’ve been wrestling with how to respond all week, and it is only after much meditation and a good ol’ fashioned gabfest with a couple girlfriends that I was finally able to gain a little perspective and therefore at least begin to be able to address such an offensive message.

THANKFUL: I am always grateful for the wonderful man in my life, the one who loves me and cares for me in a way that no other person ever has. But this week, specifically, I’m beyond thankful for his continued support in all of my random – and sometimes entirely harebrained – creative endeavors. That being said, I’m pretty sure what I’ve got cooking is chock full of potential, but my point is that without him, I’d never be able to entertain any of these wacky ideas that occupy my brain. Also, he’s the best dad ever, so there’s that.

We’ve got a few exciting things happening over the next few weeks, including a visit from Babe’s sister, and a quick trip to the desert to catch one of our favorite bands. But mostly, our days will be spent soaking up every last second of this blissful, hazy newborn phase. All the sleep in the world couldn’t compare to the sweetness of the past six weeks. I may be exhausted and a bit out of sorts, but I’m ridiculously happy and in love with this cute little family of mine.